The Last Projector - David James Keaton

"He grabbed Joe by his erection, catching it before it could turtle all the way back into his body for safety. No one believed it later, but Larry actually picked him up with it, held him off the ground like one of those retractable tape measures you would unspool just to see how long it could hover in midair before it collapsed. There was enough blood to bend it, bend it, bend it. Until...
Snap.
It turned out an erection broke like any limb, only it turned three colors first, even more colors after."

Ouch

This book is absolutely hilarious. Love, love, love it.